Overcoming jealousy.

Are you struggling with some jealousy? Me too. And here's what I learned recently about overcoming it.

Shocker: social media breeds comparison. And no one is immune to it. You see people on here, and you think, "I want that. I deserve that. Or I could do it better."

Or maybe you see people on here and you think, "I know who they REALLY are! And yet they're getting all the (fill in the blank)."

Can I be honest? I've caught myself doing that lately. Calling it "jealousy" feels so dirty, but that's what it is. I see people in my feed — some really good people who I respect, and some really fake people who I can't stand — and I've been thinking, "Why not me?"

I want their influence.

I want their platform.

I want their followers.

I want their likes.

I want their reach.

I want, I want, I want...

I'm not immune from any of that, even if it's for "good reasons," like spreading a message of hope. And my guess is, you aren't either. We can still struggle with the wrong things even if we have the right intentions.

I'm not going to lie, this has been eating at me lately. So last week I did the best thing I've learned to do when that happens. I started praying about it. And for me, prayer a lot of times looks like journaling in the mornings. Can I share with you what I wrote down?

—

I'm not created, you're not created, to be "like" others. Stop trying to be them or claim their calling and identity for yourself. God has created you to be you, not the other person you see. He's given you unique gifts, unique abilities, unique talents. He's given you a unique identity. When you pursue what others have, instead of Jesus, you miss out on what he has for you. You miss out on him. We spend so much time being jealous of what other people have, that we miss out on the purpose and calling God has for us. And the irony is that when we pursue him more than the other things we think we want, we become much more satisfied and fulfilled.

—

That all hit me hard. "I've been so caught up in wanting what other people have that I'm missing out on what God has for me."

Is that something you need to hear, too?

So how do we get "there"? How do we combat that jealousy? I think we have to get to the point where we're willing to give up everything we have planned and thought would give us safety and security and let God build us back up and reveal what we're truly called to pursue. Instead of trying to be that person or people we see on social media, we have to surrender to who he wants us to be. Daily. Small steps of obedience that sometimes don't make sense.

Maybe that actually leads to some of the things we see others doing, but it may not. And we have to be OK with that. That's not the goal. The goal is more of him.

Because in the end, the most comforting and confident place I've ever found myself is in being surrendered and open-handed. That's better than influence, and followers, and likes, and whatever else I think I want in my weak moments.

That's hard. It takes practice. I'm still practicing it. But I've found so much peace in doing so. I think — I know — you will too.

(Pic: Me contemplating all this by the campfire this weekend...)